A Chapter, Not the Book
“… And I’m afraid to sleep because of what haunts me, such as living with the uncertainty that I’ll never find the words to say which would completely explain…
Just how I’m breakin’ down.” - City and Colour
Dallas Green from City and Colour is my favorite writer and most likely my favorite musical artist of all time. Anyone who has known me since high school knows this to be true. His lyrics tend to be dark, yet hopeful, and his transition from hardcore music to acoustic, folkstyle always fascinated me. I was always a little jealous of his name. Dallas Green… get it? City, and Color.
I bring Dallas into my writing today not just to recommend his music, but because of a line I heard him speak outside of his lyrics. In an interview I saw years ago, he was asked about the tattoos he has, ranging all the way from his neck, down both arms and onto his knuckles. I’m paraphrasing, but Dallas’s message was that after so many years of wearing art on his skin, he would encourage people to reconsider getting tattoos. There is always going to be something that you wished you did differently, and even the thought of what you would change about your art will evolve over the years, so maybe such a commitment is futile. I wish I could find the interview and quote it directly, but I’ve given up after a morning of YouTube investigating.
I’m convinced that I must have seen this video AFTER I got my own tattoo sleeve; I respect the man so much that I can’t say for certain that I wouldn’t have reconsidered getting tattoos if I had seen the interview first. The funny thing is, I kind of disagree with him now anyway.
People ask all the time, as I’m sure they do to anyone with tattoos, “What do they mean?” I have never agreed that some kind of deep philosophical tenet must be attached to art. If it does, fantastic. Some people just appreciate the aesthetics. “Meaning” might make it more justifiable to make such a commitment to wearing permanent, voluntary, colored scars for the rest of your life, but I’m arguing that the justification doesn’t really matter. For everyone, those marks will provide a visual representation of a chapter of your life. That chapter exists as one part of your character’s story. I know people who were tattooed from the neck down prior to graduating high school. Another man I knew from the old New Jersey music scene had hand, neck and even scalp tattoos, got them all laser removed, and got his entire body tattooed over again. I wonder if he ever misses the old ones.
In a different interview, Dallas Green says he decided to get his knuckles tattooed the moment that he realized he would never have a “real” job and that music was going to be his path. I found this to be interesting considering his advice. As a rock star, having tattoos is an integral part of the culture. They are an extremely common part of military culture as well. It’s simply just something that is done.
Have you ever looked back at an old photo of yourself and cringed? You know, the ones you can’t convince your mom to just get rid of already? Perhaps you wished you dressed differently, or you’re embarrassed of some other perceived flaw that you grew out of. I heard recently that your growth as a writer is determined by how far back you have to read to be ashamed of your own writing. That doesn’t mean it should be erased; it is all part of the story.
Maybe what Dallas meant was to save people from their own future embarrassment. But, as I now sit in a law office with my collared shirt and pleasant demeanor, sometimes it’s nice to roll up my sleeves and see the progress the current character has made.